At Coffee Meets Bagel, our goal is to help people build genuine, lasting relationships. While most members join with good intentions, scammers sometimes use dating apps to target others through romance scams.
Our Trust & Safety team works hard to detect and remove fraudulent accounts, but knowing the warning signs is one of the best ways to protect yourself. Here are some common red flags to watch out for.
They Go From 0–100
Scammers might try to sweep you off your feet by showering you with compliments or using flowery, romantic language right off the bat. Maybe they’re “just looking for love,” or drop a “Ur the one 4 me, babe.” But you’re smarter than that, so you’ll see your match moving too fast as a red flag.
Another red flag: They’ll want to take things off the app and start texting, calling, or using other messaging apps (such as Kik, WhatsApp, LINE, or WeChat) ASAP. To cut to the chase, they may even include this contact info in their bio.
Keep in mind that not all scammers rush. Some may spend weeks—or even months—building your trust before attempting to scam you. This is especially popular in cryptocurrency dating scams, so be wary of the long game.
Their stories pull on your heartstrings
Scammers often create convincing personal stories to build trust and encourage emotional investment.
For example, they may claim to:
- Be working overseas or serving in the military.
- Be widowed or recently experienced a personal tragedy.
- Be caring for a sick child or family member.
- Have a successful career that requires frequent international travel.
While these situations can certainly be genuine, scammers often use them to explain why they can't meet in person—or later, to justify asking for financial help.
A compelling story isn't proof that someone is genuine. Focus on whether their actions consistently match what they tell you.
They’re just too good to be true
If your match has profile photos that belong in a magazine catalog, you’ve either met a model or a scammer. And while both exist in real life (models aren’t Bigfoot, after all), it would be very unlikely for a real person not to have any casual, non-professional photos in their profile pic lineup.
Take note of other profile/photo inconsistencies. For example, if their profile says they’re 35, but they look only 22 in their picture, that’s a red flag. Likewise, if their profile claims they have a high level of education, but their grammar is disjointed, something might be up.
Authentic people aren't perfect. Consistency is often a stronger sign of trustworthiness than perfection.
They Always Avoid Meeting
Meaningful relationships eventually move beyond messaging, so on Coffee Meets Bagel, we encourage members to meet in person. So if your match isn’t keen on meeting in real life or over video chat, you should raise an eyebrow.
One of the most common excuses scammers use to avoid meeting in person is claiming that they work abroad. Some scammers will dodge video chats and phone calls by claiming to be “too shy” or because they’re dealing with trust issues from past relationships. But if you’ve been talking to someone for days (or weeks) and haven’t taken these steps, that should set off alarm bells.
In situations like this, fact-checking is your friend. Try running a Google reverse image search to check if they have multiple profiles under different names or with different info. Some scammers may also steal photos from influencers, low-profile celebrities, or stock sources.
They ask for money, gift cards, or account info
Lastly, and most importantly, if your match asks you for money, gift cards, or your account information, stop all communication immediately. It is extremely likely this person is a scammer.
Some scammers will play the long game by trying to build trust with you over time. Then, suddenly, there’s an “emergency,” and they need money quickly. Here’s a few types of fake emergencies they may claim to have:
- They were robbed and need money
- They have to book a last-minute business trip
- They need a loan
- They or their family member has a medical emergency
Other scam tactics can be more aggressive, like attempting to blackmail or intimidate you into sending money. This is one reason why it’s vital you completely trust someone before sharing certain things, like where you live, your last name, or private pictures. If someone tries to extort you, block and report them immediately.
A final reminder: Even if someone doesn’t directly ask you for money or personal information, matches who spend a lot of time talking up investments, cryptocurrency, or finances should be viewed as suspicious.
A common trick with these investment scammers is to present themselves as super-wealthy. They’ll talk about deals that are too good to be true — all you have to do is try out their plan. So while you might think you’re not directly sending anyone money, you could still get scammed by third-party sites.
How to report a match on CMB
If you think you’ve come across or matched with a scammer, or if your match has violated our terms of service, please report them. By reporting a scammer, you’re preventing them from scamming other lovely bagels on our app in the future.
To report a bagel, simply tap on the flag icon that says “Hide or Report” at the bottom of their profile.